Saturday, December 17, 2005

Ask Yoda

Answer your questions here I will:

From Actual Emails


Andrew R writes:
"Here's a load of miscellaneous questions.
Are your Yoda shirts made by illegal immigrants in a sweatshop?
Has he ever thought about switching to a cheaper brand of food for Bob, like Special Bantha from Wal-Mart?
Tatooine is a desert planet, so what do banthas eat anyway? Sand? Jawas? What?"

Andrew, here a load of miscellaneous answers are:
1)Absolutely not. Made by Padawan Younglings in the Jedi Temple attic, those T-shirts are. A "sweatshop" it is not. For instance, the other day, a window I cracked open for them for an hour or two. Also, sure I make that at least one fifteen minute break they get every eight or nine hours.
2)Finicky Bob is. Much worse than gas, the cheap brand gives him, if what I mean you know.
3)Based on a common misconception this question is. Commonly believed that rain on Tatooine it does not, it is. But correct that is not. You see only rain water it does not. But rain Pork n' Beans it does. So, when banthas grazing you see, grazing on the Pork n' Beans laying on the ground from the last shower, they are. Why so gassy they are, this explains.


Lizzy M writes:
"Who does the Jedi Council's hair? It must take Millenia to comb out Kenobi's beard."

Answer:
"Comb out his beard regularly, Kenobi does not. When combed out it is, bits of food, pens, pencils, and even small animals we find."


A question for Yoda have you? Email them to me or post them in the comments you can. Perhaps answer them in an upcoming Ask Yoda post I will.

Comments on "Ask Yoda"

 

Blogger Jason said ... (2:10 AM) : 

LOL funny stuff:)

Heres a question that a'll forget if i decide to email i tomorrow.

I wonder what you would get if you mixed 2 extreme opposites like Windu and Kenobi together in to one person...

 

Blogger Jabafatboy said ... (9:12 AM) : 

I dont know about that anderew r, he just wanted to see his name in print. EVERYBODY knows hes a card carrin Bob the bantha addict, got ALL the action figures !!

Hey Yoda , what does a bantha saddle look like ?

Do you ride SIDE SADDLE ? heheheheh

 

Blogger Professor Xavier said ... (4:54 PM) : 

The younglings ought to be happy they have someone who cares enough about them to keep them amused all day. Nothing worse than a bored kid, if what I mean you know.

 

Blogger Lt. Cmdr Oneida said ... (4:57 PM) : 

Can't you use your Jedi mind-fu to convince Kenobi to stop liking cheetos, or maybe think that he likes baby carrots, not cheetos?

Do you think people would respect you more if you were taller?

Why exactly do you all have a Bantha, why is the P-word a trigger word?

 

Blogger Lt. Cmdr Oneida said ... (5:41 PM) : 

and by people I mean Windu, Harvey, Yaddle, Kenobi, etc. Outside the temple we are in awe of you and your force wedgies. Just wanted to clairify that.

 

Blogger Peter Twister said ... (7:28 PM) : 

This is what I always wanted to know:

1) What planet are you from?

2) Why always in inverted gramatical order do you speak?

3) Do you think the female of your same specie that appears at the jedi council in episode I is hot?

 

Blogger Obi-Wan Kenobi said ... (9:05 PM) : 

What species are'ya again?

 

Blogger Vegeta said ... (9:19 PM) : 

Can I use my Ki powere as a substitute for the Force What I mean is can I give people Ki wedgies?

 

Blogger Master Yoda said ... (9:22 PM) : 

Good questions these are. Use them in a future Ask Yoda post I may. However, answered some of them already have been. See below for those answers you can.

Peter Twister, Kenobi - You're question about my species, answered in this post they are.

Lt Cmdr Oneida, Contained in this post and this post, background information on Bob the Bantha is. Answered partly in this post, your question about the p-word is.

 

Blogger Lt. Cmdr Oneida said ... (2:34 AM) : 

I read your Survivor blog update of "That Which Speak of Ever Again We Whall Not" I laughed so hard I nearly fell out of my chair. I'm so sad we couldn't get the broadcast on our ship. I even know someone who was on it. Oh well, maybe I can find a tape of that episode.
Thanks for answering my question, Master Yoda, you're a sweetie *kiss*

 

Blogger Norton said ... (5:17 PM) : 

Master Yoda, I have a question.

How do Stormtroopers go to the toilet?
It doesn't look as if the armour is easy to remove, even with that big white codpiece.

Also, why is the Millenium Falcon called a "Falcon" when it looks nothing like any falcon I've ever seen?

Thank you veddy much!

 

Anonymous mattom said ... (7:15 PM) : 

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

 

Anonymous jedi said ... (11:17 AM) : 

master yoda what happens if a master is found having a wife

 

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