Sunday, December 11, 2005

Stranded In the Bathroom I Was

"Stranded" in the bathroom I was again. For the toilet paper I reached, and no toilet paper there was. Once again, put another roll on the roller, the person who used the last piece did not! So annoying this is! Another round of Force-wedgies I will have to administer soon.

Here, down around the ankles my pants were, so go get another roll, I could not. So using the Force, out I reached with my mind - down the hallway, around the corner, down the stairs, inside the supply closet, to the shelf on the left. Yes, sense the paper I could. For one of the rolls I reached. No, wait! The quilted kind that is not! The rough, sandpapery kind that is. Save it for Windu I must. To another box with my mind I reached. Yes, the soft, squeezable, quilted kind that was.

With the Force, one of the rolls I pulled out. Float out of the closet, up the stairs and down the hallway towards me, I made it. Then, resistance I felt. So more forcefully I pulled the roll. Floating towards me it resumed.

Finally, to me the roll came. Attached to it Kenobi. My pants I pulled up quickly, "Kenobi?! Doing what here, are you?"

"I saw this roll of toilet paper floatin down the hallway, and I thought, you know, that's perty cool and all, but we're short on toilet paper as it is. We cain't afford to have toilet paper just floatin away and escapin on us. So I grabbed it, but it drug me all the way here."

See I could that right he was. On his face, a big rug burn was.

"Hurt did that not?"

"Yeah, especially going up them stairs. I didn't know my head could get bumped so much and me still being alright."

"Kenobi," I said, "just let go why did you not?"

"'Cause ain't no roll of no toilet paper beat me yet, and and I wasn't about to let this one beat me, neither."

With Kenobi, sometimes better not to ask too many questions it is.

Comments on "Stranded In the Bathroom I Was"


Anonymous Anonymous said ... (8:25 AM) : 

Theres a Quilted Kind ?

Sandpaper's all I ever knoew about, Wifiepoo been holdin out on me!


Blogger Jon the Intergalactic Gladiator said ... (10:50 AM) : 

Oh man, not the scratchy toilet paper!

You could do what I did in college, I started hoarding the TP because I was the only guy in the house buying it. I didn't want to be out just case a pretty girl was visiting or something, you know.


Anonymous Anonymous said ... (12:13 PM) : 

Why all that waste? Why not use recycle newspaper? That way you enjoy the funnies and save the trees all at the same time.


Blogger Jean-Luc Picard said ... (2:46 PM) : 

A force-wedgie for Kenobi is coming, I fear.


Anonymous wedge antillies said ... (3:14 PM) : 

It is comforting to know that even the great Mr. Yoda has the problems as I do! It is what my Dad told me, "Don't sit down until you have checked your supplies!"


Blogger Obi-Wan Kenobi said ... (3:31 PM) : 

Yeh cain't blame me fer bein' responsible.


Blogger Lt. Cmdr Oneida said ... (4:31 PM) : 

Wedge, you'd think after 800-900 years of existance, Master Yoda would have figured out that very profound lesson.
The people at the Temple should get those snazy toliets they have on planet Japan. They wash and dry, no TP needed. They also make pretty sounds to cover impolite sounds, and some have a deodorizer spray. Think of the trees you would save, esp. since Coruscant has all of 4 trees, it'd be impressive.


Blogger Jason said ... (7:54 PM) : 


he could do the sensible thing and CHECK to see if there is any TP left FIRST


Blogger Professor Xavier said ... (8:03 PM) : 

You and your fancy Jedi ways. If Kenobi got a rug burn that means you have rugs in your bathroom. Imagine, carpeted bathrooms! Now that's some high living, right there.


Blogger Jedi Katt said ... (8:42 PM) : 

well, I found so many rolls of toilet paper around me in Anison while there is a shortage of toilet paper in the Temple? Well, I'll try bring some of them back.


Blogger Master Yoda said ... (8:56 PM) : 

Jabafatboy, - Good for hemorrhoids, the sandpaper kind is.

Jon I.G. - Tried that before I have. But when several female Jedi you live with, no such thing as hording toilet paper there is.

Anonymous - Quilted, recycled paper is not. Only use to the quilted kind, my tushy is.

Cpt Picard - A daily occurance, that is.

Wedge, Lt. Cmdr, Jason - Yes, that trick I know! But when almost 900 years you reach, as forgetful you will be too!

Kenobi - But blame you for being a doofus, I can.

Professor X - In the hallway and on the stairs, the carpet is. Ugly old linoleum in the bathroom we have. Now a Danger Room, a Big Brainy Machine, and a playground that opens up for a supersonic jet - living that is!


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