Tuesday, December 06, 2005

Programming the VCR

Out tomorrow while Matlock is on, I will have to be. Stop a Separtist incursion on to Kashyyyk I must. Usually, schedule my smiting for when on, Matlock is not, I try. But unavoidable this time, it was.

So to program the VCR today I tried. Impossible that is! For an hour I fiddled with it. Figure it out I could not.

So Windu I called over. A long time he messed with it. Finally, his hands he threw up, "I give up! I even applied my Positive Pretty Thinking to it, and I still can't figure this thing out!"

Young Skywalker I called over. "I ain't never met a machine I couldn't figure out, yo," changed to, "Yo dawg, my brain don't feel too good right now. Seriously, yo. I think I sprained it or sumthin."

So other members of the Jedi Council I called in. For a long time, they worked on it. Still get it to progam we could not. Also, some of the best scientists working for the Republic I called in too. Figure it out, even they could not. Desperate I was, so some of those super smart Kaminoans (Kaminoins?,Kaminians? Kaminonese?) who figured out how to clone people, I had flown in.

At first, working out it was not. "This technology," one of the Kaminoans Lama Su said, "must come from a very advanced alien civilization. It is far too complex for us to figure out. Obviously, it was designed by and for beings who had a much higher capacity for thought than we have. Their brains must have been enormous."

But still, for 3 more hours, the Kamino scientists and the Jedi Masters worked on it. Finally, one of the scientists said, "We've done it! We've cracked the code! This VCR is programmed! Now, Master Yoda, you may simply sit back and let this device do the rest."

"Programmed it is?"

"Yes! It will record your program for you to watch at your leisure."

"Then figured it out, you have?"

"Oh, yes. We're quite sure we have every little thing about this device figured out.

"Then still flashing '12:00', why is it?"

Eventually, dwindling the crowd was. After dinnertime it was, and still figured out how to program the VCR we had not.

About that time, into the room Harvey the Youngling walked. "Whatsa matter, Master Yoda?"

"Oh, program the VCR we can not. Impossible it is."

"What time is your show on?" he asked.

"1:00 pm tomorrow. Ask why do you?"

"OK, it's all set. It's gonna record your show for you. Bye now."

What the - ? At the VCR I looked. Flashing '12:00' anymore it was not. The menu I checked. Set to record Matlock it was.

I think sick I am going to be.

Comments on "Programming the VCR"


Anonymous Anonymous said ... (9:11 AM) : 

Its a conspiracy to undermine the authority of the older ones. I have a dishwasher ,that I have the same problem with, requires a Degree in physics , or a 6 yr old to operate.


Anonymous Glenn Stone said ... (10:01 AM) : 

You should have asked Kenobi. I'm sure he learned how so he wouldn't miss any of his wrestling shows.


Anonymous wedge antillies said ... (10:52 AM) : 

I did notice that no one looked at the owner's manual, of course that was probably tossed out long ago. I am just gald that they didn't require a VCR test when I graduated from the Acadamy. (Maybe that is why the new pilots look so young now?)


Blogger Serra said ... (10:54 AM) : 

Oh, fer crying out loud, you're a Jedi Master and you can't program a VCR? Call Bob the Bantha next time--bet he can swing it.


Blogger trinamick said ... (12:28 PM) : 

I have a theory that VCRs are created by the same rocket scientists who made child-proof medicine bottles.


Blogger flu said ... (3:06 PM) : 

It's shame Harvey left that snot all over the buttons.


Blogger Lt. Cmdr Oneida said ... (3:09 PM) : 

Yes, well, VCR's are the final test to graduate with a computer enginnering degree from the Republic Naval Academy. I passed, but not well enough to get a safe, cushy, 'stay inside the shielded spaceship' job. I recorded 'Murder, She Wrote' instead of 'Highlander'.


Blogger Vegeta said ... (3:56 PM) : 

Oddly Kakarot can't function in normal soiety. But he can program a vcr maybe because he thinks like a 6 year old.


Anonymous Murber said ... (4:30 PM) : 

You had an evil twin!



Blogger Professor Xavier said ... (7:23 PM) : 

The best way to deal with an uncooperative VCR is with a lightsaber. At the very least, the other appliances will get the message and stay in line.


Blogger Nic said ... (7:40 PM) : 

Leave it to the kids to be the technogeeks and be able to program anything before you can say "I've already tried it".

Glad you are able to watch your Matlock though. I loved that show as a kid.


Blogger Son Goku said ... (8:34 PM) : 

I do not think like a 6 year old I can't help it if you and tecnology don't mix Vegeta oooooh! Christmas cookies!!!


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