Monday, December 12, 2005

The Life That Would Be

So happy I am! A letter with Ed McMahon's picture on the envelope I just received! It turns out, already a winner I may be!

Good news this is! Use a million credits I could. Expensive, Bob the Bantha's medical and psychological bills are. Retire from the Order I could. Spend my days on a nice beach somewhere, I could.

Have to see Kenobi walk around the house in his tighty-whities scratching himself anymore I would not. No more spontaneous wrestling moves would I have to put up with. No more explaining Beetle Bailey to him every morning.

And worry about Young Skywalker borrowing my speeder then leaving mysterious stains in it, I would not have to. Need to listen to him "keepin it real" with his gangsta slang, I would not. Share the bathroom with his vast array of hair accoutrements I would not need to. No more finding his Spider-man Underoos on the bathroom floor.

And have to listen to Windu talk for hours at a time about how pretty he is, I would not. Never have to answer the question, "Does this make my butt look big?" anymore would I. No need to listen to his lectures about proper skin moisturization would there be.

Yes... sniff. Put up with that stuff anymore I would not have to... Sniff ... Yes, pretty nice that would be...

Maybe retire right away I would not. Yes, unfair to the Council that would be. Stay on for a while to train my replacement I would need to. Yes, take years that could.

Shut up, Young Skywalker! Crying I am not! Something in my eye there is!

Comments on "The Life That Would Be"

 

Blogger Jason said ... (12:23 AM) : 

soooo.....did you actually win or what?

 

Blogger Lt. Cmdr Oneida said ... (12:51 AM) : 

"And worry about Young Skywalker borrowing my speeder then leaving mysterious stains in it" umm, hmm, well then, no comment.

 

Blogger Jon the Intergalactic Gladiator said ... (7:39 AM) : 

Eww, yeah.

Jason's right, did you actually open the envelope yet?

 

Blogger Master Yoda said ... (7:47 AM) : 

Won yet, I have not. Send back a response I must. But it says that between me and only 10 other people in Coruscant it is!

Also, some nice offers for magazine subscriptions the envelope contained!

 

Blogger Jabafatboy said ... (9:06 AM) : 

Does it contain a subscription for the magazine, Victorias secret "yoda Edition ".

Wait , now that I think about it that thought even scares me.

Ewwwwww ( full body shudder )

 

Blogger Agen Kolar said ... (2:13 PM) : 

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

 

Blogger flu said ... (2:34 PM) : 

Master Yoda, are you sure those aren't YOUR Spidey underoos? Or Windu's?

I know all you Jedis have 'em... yes, you, too - don't deny it.

Look for quote #8?

 

Blogger Master Yoda said ... (2:40 PM) : 

Please, family-friendly your comments keep. Thank you!

 

Blogger Master Yoda said ... (2:42 PM) : 

Young Starbucker,

That senile I am not! Know if they were my Tighty-Spideys I would. That is, if Tighty-Spideys I wear, and saying that I do, I am not.

 

Blogger Lt. Cmdr Oneida said ... (3:28 PM) : 

I think you should make Skywalker get your speeder datailed, some of those brightly colored sugar drinks will never come out if you let the stain set.

 

Blogger Private Hudson said ... (4:20 PM) : 

I say shoot 'em.

 

Blogger Anakin Skywalker said ... (10:22 PM) : 

Yo, you go down there an demand you be the winner. That McMahon hater'll haveta give you the benjamins if you force-wedgie him.

 

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