Monday, February 13, 2006

At the Firing Range

Down at the Army firing range inspecting the new Clone Troopers, I was. Some old guy standing around shooting the blasters I noticed. Recognize him I did not, but some kind of big shot he was supposed to be:

Very excited about shooting blasters, he was. Several shots at a target he took.

"Wow, I did pretty good that time, didn't I?" he asked the officer that was helping him.

"Well," the officer said, "let's take a look at your target, Mr. Cheney."

target "You're doing much better. You even managed to actually hit the paper this time," the officer said, "Of course, you also took out a lamppost, a bird flying overhead, and a speeder parked across the street.

"I coulda sworn I hit that guy on the target, though."

"No sir, that was the Clone Trooper next to you."

"Oh yeah. Uh, sorry about that."

"It's ok sir, we can always make more Clone Troopers."

"Well, I'm gonna try it again."

At that, to the ground everyone dropped. Several shots, this guy fired at his target. At the end, the only part of the whole firing range still standing, his target was. I think let this guy any where near a blaster, they should not.

Comments on "At the Firing Range"


Blogger Geewhiz said ... (1:19 AM) : 

Haha! Best swipe at Cheney I've seen to-date (all one and a half days!)


Anonymous medrewnotyou said ... (1:40 AM) : 

That, Master, was the Vice-Emperor Cheney. Some say he controls things behind the scenes, but who knows... The main thing is that, like Emperor Bush, he didn't participate in the war on planet Vietnam, so he can be excused from his lack of martial skills.

But...I think Oneida would agree that he's not one the clones would want on the field. Especially considering what he might do to the Lt Cmndr to take control. I shudder to think of the shots in the back she might take.

With the council and Oneida's approval, I could cut off a hand or two to prevent the Vice-Emperor from such an incident again...


Anonymous Mailman said ... (3:33 AM) : 

I have a Valentine's card from Vampirella


Blogger Jon the Intergalactic Gladiator said ... (8:42 AM) : 

Hey, does the energy discharge from the blaster fire affect his pacemaker at all?


Blogger Wedge Antillies said ... (10:34 AM) : 

Back to your original reason for being at the firing range, Mr. Yoda. What do you look for when you inspect a new Clone Trooper?

It is pretty obvious that Mr. Chaney is not strong with the Force. Either that or he had been driking heavily before shooting the blaster.


Blogger JawaJuice said ... (10:54 AM) : 

LOL! Great picture.


Blogger Lt. Cmdr Oneida said ... (1:26 PM) : 

Well, if Vice-Emperor Chaney was aiming at my back, I'd worry more about the people standing near me, but still *looks over shoulder to see who is behind her*

With the council and Oneida's approval, I could cut off a hand or two to prevent the Vice-Emperor from such an incident again...
I get a say in this? Cool! I say cut off three, just for good measure. But then they'd probably build him some new hands and whatnot that could aim. Then I would have to watch my back.

And that is a very funny picture


Anonymous medrewnotyou said ... (1:43 PM) : 

Well presumably you're supposed protect the Emp and Vice-Emp... :}


Blogger A Army Of (Cl)One said ... (1:50 PM) : 

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.


Blogger A Army Of (Cl)One said ... (5:00 PM) : 

Ocuh, ouch ouch. Now I will go and visit Barriss


Anonymous Anonymous said ... (8:41 PM) : 

To fire a blaster ,
Ole cheney , he went
to the firing range
with a friend, an old gent.

He fired with glee
at the target , shots spent
but sadly all he hit
was his friend , the old gent.

Vogen Poetry


Anonymous medrewnotyou said ... (9:10 PM) : 

Ooh, ooh! The man suffered a heart attack because of the wound! Scary! (For the multiple heart species here, humans are kind of fragile with their one heart so this is a bit serious.)


Blogger Lt. Cmdr Oneida said ... (11:13 PM) : 

Yes, well I am presumably supposed to protect them, but most of the time around the vice-chancellor is spent trying to find cover, he's pretty trigger happy. He can maintain a safety perimeter all on his own. My clones are under orders to avoid bodily harm to themselves.

So yes, in theory, we are supposed to protect him, but it's hard when you're crouching next to a speeder, hiding behind a tree, using a sentor's third throphy wife as a shield, etc..


Anonymous medrewnotyou said ... (1:03 AM) : 

Is it seditious to say that maybe he could go without an escort... permanently?


Blogger Lt. Cmdr Oneida said ... (1:14 AM) : 

Yes, it is. But I think the wyoming part of him finds that type of statement flattering, so I won't have to arrest you.


Anonymous medrewnotyou said ... (1:51 AM) : 

That's good. Being in prison with a few giant Wookies is no fun, believe me.


Anonymous Mara said ... (7:50 PM) : 

How come so many people can't spell Cheney? No wonder these fools got into power, America's full of illiterates who pay no attention to anything.


Blogger Lt. Cmdr Oneida said ... (8:47 PM) : 

Sorry to upset your spelling anal retentiveness, mara. The world is a better place because of you and your kind who have nothing better to do than to see the flaws in all things. I bet you're wicked fun on a date :)


Blogger A Army Of (Cl)One said ... (10:13 PM) : 

SNAP! Ouch!!! Dang, that must have stung!!


Blogger Lt. Cmdr Oneida said ... (1:00 AM) : 

Yeah, I know, not very nice or charitable on my part, AOC. And if Master Yoda wants me to take down my response to keep things friendly, I will


Blogger Master Yoda said ... (6:18 AM) : 

Make me separate you two, do not!


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