Saturday, December 31, 2005

Things That Get Accomplished This Year I Did Not

A year of hopes and dreams for me, this year was going to be. Going to get many things accomplished I was. Unfortunately, finally watching all of my "Gilligan's Island the 3rd Season DVD" the only thing I got accomplished was. Below, a list of things that get accomplished I did not is.

Things That Get Accomplished This Year I Did Not

-Convince Kenobi that an actual sport, "Distance Spitting" is not.
-Learn to speak Wiggerese, so that undertand what Young Skywalker is saying most of the time I can.
-Become a professional Salsa dancer.
-Track down that awful smell in the Temple that noticing I keep.
-Get help for my Ben and Jerry's addiction.
-Lose 2 pounds. Yes, ambitious that is, but getting portly I am.
-Get my VCR to stop blinking "12:00".
-Convince Windu that give up his My Little Pony collection, he must.
-Smite down Dooku, then a jig on his grave, dance.
-Convince Dolly Parton that in love with me, she is.
-Convince Yaddle that her "Sweet Baboo" I am not.
-Figure out a way to grow four feet taller.
-Find out how many licks to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop it takes.
-Find a barber who a decent hair cut can give me. No good, bringing in that picture of George Clooney and saying, "Like this I would like to look", seems to do.

Maybe accomplish these things next year I can. Of course, other goals for next year I have, so backed up I am. But take care of that, Metamucil usually does. (Hee hee! A little digestional humor that was!)

Comments on "Things That Get Accomplished This Year I Did Not"


Anonymous redheadwithbedhead said ... (2:07 AM) : 

Happy New Year Master Yoda!


Blogger Jon the Intergalactic Gladiator said ... (2:32 AM) : 

Yes, happy new year.

I think you can do 2 punds. Just eat more celery, Master Yoda.


Anonymous bellringr said ... (3:10 AM) : 

Happy New Year Master Yoda!

Oh, I can answer one of those questions for you. Long ago when I was a youngling on a road trip to a place called Ohio, I was very bored and counted how many licks it took to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop. 572 is the answer.

I hope this makes you feel a little better. :)


Blogger Lt. Cmdr Oneida said ... (3:28 AM) : 

The clones want to know if they can have Windu's My Little Pony Collection if you get him to part with it. They assure me it's for tactical training and strategy planning.

And if you figure out how to grow taller, let me know.


Blogger Vegeta said ... (4:26 AM) : 

Happy New year and all that stuff. Thanks for the amusment of giving the Force wedgie to Wolverine After seeingit I think I can emulate it.


Blogger jedisiri said ... (4:38 AM) : 

Happy new year and I DO think being a professional Salsa dancer should be accomplish. *nod*


Anonymous Anonymous said ... (9:08 AM) : 

A Mighty list that is.

The idea is to consolidate !!

Give up Ben & Jerrys/ Lose two Pounds.

Etc: Etc: Etc:


Blogger Professor Xavier said ... (9:36 AM) : 

I can help with at least one of those. I have it on very good authority (television), that it only takes three licks to get to the center of a tootsie roll pop.


Blogger Jean-Luc Picard said ... (10:25 AM) : 

Perhaps you should set your goals a little lower this year?


Anonymous Anonymous said ... (11:08 AM) : 

I agree with the capt...

At least you did get to give Wolverine a Force wedgie

Best of Luck to you and Oneida on the race (I am still cheering :) )


Blogger Jon the Intergalactic Gladiator said ... (1:19 PM) : 

Master Yoda, I just saw that the latest issue of Reader Digest has an article on Dolly! maybe you should check it out.


Blogger Jason said ... (1:32 PM) : 

Didn't harvey the youngling fix your VCR?

Happy New Year btw :)


Blogger jedi wookiee said ... (8:46 PM) :
for some kick-ass stories in the context of this blog!!
very funny!!


Blogger Jango Fett said ... (9:19 PM) : 

Yoda I have a VCR that blinks "12:00" all the time. I have a way to fix that! Get your lightsaber or a hard steel pole and start pounding the VCR until the clock goes to the correct Time.

Works great. Try It :)


Anonymous Padawan Patty said ... (9:23 PM) : 


For those salsa lessons "Ballroom bootcamp" can get you dancing within weeks. The only problem that you might have is in trying getting into those tight glittery outfits. For that you have to loose those two pounds.


Blogger Revan said ... (9:28 PM) : 

Hey, I'm a member of unplugged, how come I don't have a link? WAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!!! sniff I hate you all. I'm going to kill you all in your sleep!!! Just kidding :)


Blogger Jango Fett said ... (9:52 PM) : 

Congrats Revan! Yoda neds your advice on one of the things he didnt complete last year.


Blogger Master Yoda said ... (10:54 PM) : 


Sorry about that, I am. Slow about updating my links, my Stupid Intern is! Put your blog in their tonight, he will.


Blogger Jango Fett said ... (11:36 PM) : 

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.


Blogger Jango Fett said ... (11:40 PM) : 

You forgot to link me Yoda! I forgive you. This is the way we Madalordians say sorry....

You push them until they fall over. :)


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