Planet Florida

Been studying this planet called "Florida", I have. A puzzle it is. It seems that many ways to die there, there is. Safe in the water you are not. Regularly eaten by sharks, this race of people called "surfers" are. Safe outside on the land you are not. Odds are, struck by lightning you will be. Safe in your own neighborhood you are not. Every day, come out of a pond and carry someone off from their own backyard, an alligator will. Safe anywhere on Planet Florida you are not during the summer, because hit by several hurricanes you will be. Live on this planet why would anyone?!! Maybe leave the planet, many can not. I know that enslaved by a very rich and powerful mafia boss known only as "Mickey the Mouse", many Floridians are. Several years ago, stranded on Planet Florida a youngling named Elian Gonzalez was. Brought there by magical dolphins or something he was. Know I do not. Something amazing he must have done. Otherwise, pay him so much attention that whole planet would not have. Anyway, to keep him on the planet many Floridians actually fought! It seems to me that safer on his home planet away from the lightning/alligators/sharks, he would have been. But, live on this planet why would anyone else? Maybe so alluring the native females are, that bring themselves to leave, the men can not? Hmm, no, be the reason that can not. Maybe smart enough to leave, these people are not. After all, trouble with simple counting they have. Especially hard for them, the counting of votes is. Two or three times it takes them before right they get it. Even then, sure they are not. Another question I have - with so much death on that planet, still growing why is the population? Perhaps with this race known as "retirees" the answer lies. Every winter, a spiritual pilgramage to this planet many old people from this race make. Often relocating there permantly they end up. Like to know who is tricking these old people into moving to this dangerous planet I would! Teach those con artists a lesson, I would! Hmph!