Thursday, September 29, 2005

Windu, the Cure for Common Boredom

Bored I am. Bored. Bored. Bored.

I guess smite down some evil doers I could. Nah, done that already today I have.

Force-wedgies? Nah, getting monotonous that is. Almost used to it, the Jedi are now.

Mess with Windu, I could. Yes, always fun that is.

"Windu, a spot you missed on your head."

"A spot?"

"Yes. When polishing your head you were. A spot you missed."

"Oh my God! I went out in public like this! Why don't people tell me these things?! Where? Where's the spot? Show me."

"Oh. See it clearly now, I can. My mistake that is. Miss a spot you did not."

"Well, thank goodness! You about gave me a coronary there."

"Yes, like a common liver spot it looks to me."

"What?! Oh no! No, no, no! I'm too young to start getting liver spots! Oh God!"

"Calm down, Windu. Maybe a liver spot it is not. Caused by a tumor it could be."

"Noooooo! Why?! Why me? I'm too pretty to die! Life is so unfair! Why couldn't it have been someone with dry skin or an irregularly shaped head? Why?!!!"

"Oh, wait."

"What? What is it?"

"This spot I recognize. A sign of Naboosian Skin Lice, it is."

"Naboosian Skin Lice? That's impossible! My hygiene is impeccable! I've won awards..."

"Attracted to over-moisturized skin, Naboosian Skin Lice are."

"They are?!"

"Yes, a rich breeding ground for them it is."

"No! This is worse than the liver spot! How do I get them out?"

"Only one way there is, but maybe do it you will not."

"What is it? I'll do anything!"

"Ok, get down on all fours you must."

"Like this?"

"Yes, yes. Good that is. Now, drive them out by making a loud noise you must."

"GET OUT OF MY HEAD! Like that?"

"No, more high-pitched it must be. Maybe if like a wamphog you squealed..."

"WEEEEEE! WEEEEEE! Like that?"

"Yes, yes. But louder you must squeal."

"WEEEEEEEE!!!!! WEEEEEEE!!!"

"Good, Windu. Now do that for a couple more hours you must, then spray you with the pressure washer I will so that make sure all the lice are out we can."

Hee hee hee hee! Never an excuse to be bored I have.

Comments on "Windu, the Cure for Common Boredom"

 

Blogger jedisiri said ... (12:55 AM) : 

WEEEEEEEEEEE!hey it feels nice!

 

Anonymous Kel said ... (6:44 AM) : 

Master Yoda. Have you found some 'special' lotion to give to Windu to help get rid of the lice?

 

Blogger Jon the Intergalactic Gladiator said ... (7:53 AM) : 

I find it hard to believe that Mace could be so gullable, and yet it is so funny when he is...

 

Blogger Haris said ... (9:27 AM) : 

Master Yoda, I am so sorry for your loss. I have just heard that Mary Kate and Ashley Olson have been in a terrible crach and have sustained life threateing injuries when they chrashed with the Dolly Parton tour buss. Dolly has passed away. All indications say that she was on her way to "a galaxy far far away" to profess her love to her looooooooong time fan. Now that she is dead teh rights holder to her image and all her sound and video recordings a mestireus entity simply known as the Counthas stated that he plans to clone the singer so that she can record songs such as :These frogs are made for killing, Yoda is an old decrepit monkey. I hate yoda, Die Yoda Die and the likes. But than again it coudl have been worse I mean you ahev been alive for almost 900 years this cant be the first death of someone you lie.






( Bored I was not but believe in carma I do)


(not really)

 

Anonymous jedi padawan puppy said ... (10:06 AM) : 

Maybe you should tell Windu that to fully rid the lice, that he has to do something really gross..... Like kiss Kenobi or something. Oh, and if you do that, make sure you have a camra with you.

 

Blogger JawaJuice said ... (11:17 AM) : 

wow...I never thought I'd see the day when Yoda would be telling Windu he's gonna squeal like a pig....It just ain't right.

 

Blogger Jason said ... (11:40 AM) : 

I say you tell him he has to suck the cheetos out of Kenobi's nose to cure his lice...*snickers*

 

Blogger ki adi mundi said ... (2:02 PM) : 

Ahhhh, that explains what Windu was doing today in the corridor. For a moment I thought that he had caught a bout of Tattooine Typhoid Fever.

By the way, do come over to my humble space on the net right here

 

Blogger Leia said ... (3:20 PM) : 

You need to get a camcorder.

 

Anonymous 2nd Padawan from the Right said ... (5:59 PM) : 

Master Yoda ... fortunately we the Loyal Padawan are way too young to remember Ned Beatty in that movie, otherwise the image of Master Windu squealing like this could damage our sensitive little psyches. If bored you are may we humbly recommend some other ways to pass your most valuable time:
1 - Installing a splash guard in the Jedi Urinals (You know that we little folk have to carry an umbrella every time Master Kenobi and Anakin Skywalker go in there. How is it that they can shoot buzz droids offa star cruiser in the dark of space doing barrel rolls at the speed of light and can't hit the bowl)?
2 - Join us in the Playroom ... we're building a Bantha from a kit,
3 - Watch fourth Padawan from the Center turn his eyelids inside out ... Awesome!
4 - Practice our Lightsaber skills while wearing these mixing bowls on our heads ... Does this really have a practical application in the real world ... Sir?

 

Blogger Anakin Skywalker said ... (9:30 PM) : 

Ohhhh okay, that splains it. I kicked him, just in case he was all nutty or whatev, though.

An cause... well... he was in such a kickable position.

 

Blogger Mace Windu said ... (7:47 PM) : 

THAT WAS REAL?????? I thought it was all a dream, well that explains why It hurt so bad when Anakin kicked me.

 

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