Wednesday, September 28, 2005

A Rash I Have

A rash I have. Very itchy it is. Supposed to scratch it I am not, otherwise, make it worse I will.

The doctor says caused by stress it is. I think the truth he is telling. The more stressed out I feel, the more it itches. Very hard not to scratch it, it is.

The doctor also says avoid stress for now I must. To be calm I should try. But live with these doofuses, he does not.

First, up to me Windu comes, "Yoda, we have got to talk about the severe lack of shininess among the Jedi. Everyone seems to be neglecting their skin care. I mean, it is an epidemic. This is serious, man! And don't get me started on the lack of exfoliation! But we have got to do something about this before it's too late. When can you and I meet on this? It shouldn't take more than three or four hours to discuss it."

Scratch I must not. Scratch I must not.

Then, a call from Jar Jar I received. "Yoda, mesa forgetten. Issen mesa supposed to putten on mesa pants first, or mesa shoes? Mesa forgetten every time! Yousa show mesa again, yes?"

Scratch not! Scratch not! Scratch not!

Then, Kenobi. "Master, I need your help again. I got another Cheeto stuck up my nose. Can ya get it out? That sucker's in there pretty deep. I tried usin' the Force and everything. But it ain't budgin'. You're just gonna hafta go in their and yank it out. Here, look. Can ya see it? It's in there real deep."

Scratch...not! No! Fight the urge, I must!

Then, Young Skywalker. "Uh, look, Little Y... I was like real careful and spit with your speeder, yo. But, uh, they's this gash, uh, I mean dent on it. A real little tiny dent, yo. But, like, ok, see it wasn't my fault! Fuh real! Nah, see, I just stopped at this Gas n' Slurp to score a Big Gulp, yo. And when I came out, your ride was like dented and spit. Nah, fuh real! I ain't lyin!"

Aaaaaaah! Take it any more I can not!

Before it I knew, ripped up my own clothes in a scratching frenzy I had. From the looks of things, somehow Young Skywalker's clothes too I had ripped. Maybe gotten a little carried away I had. Getting better my rash is not.

Comments on "A Rash I Have"


Blogger jedisiri said ... (1:03 AM) : 

oh poor master need a hug.*hug*


Blogger Jedi Katt said ... (1:03 AM) : 

Well, you got stress??? Why don't you go to pressure washing??? *nice smile* and also, you need some medicine or some treatments? Heard tht spa in Anison can help a lot! Contact Master Tachi if you need it.


Blogger Jar Jar Binks said ... (1:08 AM) : 

What? Issen berry difficult to remember!


Blogger Jar Jar Binks said ... (1:08 AM) : 

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.


Blogger Haris said ... (3:42 AM) : 

I feel for you Master Yoda. As someone who survived the measels and lice durinmg the war, and now... well I wont go into details, I know how it is not to scratch something that you oh so want to scratch. My advice, brake all your fingers and your arm for good measure and put them in one of those all body casts because no one can resist the sweet temptetion of a rashy itch. This advice brought to you by the Luis "Crusher" Magnatawski, rash itch menagment specialist.


Blogger Jon the Intergalactic Gladiator said ... (7:34 AM) : 

Does Jar Jar even wear shoes?


Blogger Chancellor Palpatine said ... (8:21 AM) : 

Maybe you have chicken pox... do they even have chickens over at the temple?


Blogger flu said ... (9:59 AM) : 

Did reading this post make anyone else itchy?

Master Yoda, why not get some topical anti-itch ointment from Windu? You know he's got some...


Anonymous Jedi Padawan Puppy said ... (10:52 AM) : 

I have a suggestion Master Yoda, why not duck tape you rash spot to like, a board or something that you cant get off and you cant scatch.

That's what my wanna be jedi padawan says......

Of corse she is a dog.........

BTW, This is my first time commenting.... HI EVERYONE!!!


Blogger JawaJuice said ... (11:22 AM) : 

Master Yoda, I think perhaps it’s time for you to take a little vacation. Maybe someplace warm and tropical so you can relax. Perhaps a visit back at Dagobah? You must have racked up quite a bit of vacation time over your several hundred years as Jedi Leader.


Blogger Jason said ... (11:58 AM) : 

Yeah but we all know hes got a LOT of vacation time coming up...maybe he should do some stress relieving force wedgies followed up with lots of knock knock jokes :)


Blogger Draco-7 said ... (3:08 PM) : 

Maybe you should try some kind of magical ointment of doom, Master Y.


Blogger Anakin Skywalker said ... (5:14 PM) : 

Scratch with your lightsaber, yo.

When I had the banthapox when I was all little an spit, my mom made some kinda lotion or sumthin outta scurrier guts an that helped.

An you owe me fifty credits for the illin cloak you totally went ape on, Yodes.


Blogger Master Yoda said ... (5:39 PM) : 

Take it out of what you owe me for the damage to my speeder, you can.


Blogger ki adi mundi said ... (7:13 PM) : 

kenobi came to you too about the stuck Cheeto?

Anyway, i just hope the itching isn't contagious, i dont wanna break out in rashes again *shudders at the thought of the beefaroni the other day*


Anonymous 2nd Padawan from the Right said ... (7:24 PM) : 

Master Yoda ... Needless to say, we the Loyal Padawan are very concerned about your health. The last time you were sick he had to sit through 2 days of Master Kenobi explaining to us that Professional Wrestling was real and why we should care. Believe us, there are alternate places we considered "getting a Cheeto stuck" other then his nose. Worse yet, Anakin Skywalker could fill in but he just sits there and listens to "His Music" on that Ipod, and frankly just creeping some of us out. Since we are Younglings we have taken up a Calamine collection on your behalf. 3rd Padawan from the left still has a bunch from his bout of Hutt Hives last week. Pink on green? Chaaaaaaaah! Good luck ... Sir!


Blogger Master Yoda said ... (11:00 PM) : 

2nd Padawan,

Touched by your concern I am. Tell the other younglings in your class that wait until tomorrow to start re-shingling the Temple roof, you can.


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