Mashed Potatoes, Kenobi, and Scrabble

Playing Scrabble with Kenobi I was today. But first, like to tell you about a great product you should know about, I would... < commercial endorsement>Been very hot it has. Buckets, I sweat. Stained under the arms my robe can get. Very embarrasing it can be. That's why Force Guard w/Extra Sith Protection I use. Strong enough for a man it is, PH balanced for a tiny green person it is. Now the confidence I have to raise my arm when smiting down the Dark Side I am.</commercial endorsement> Pay for the Dolly CDs some way, I have to. Expense it to the Jedi Order I can not, especially since caught me that one time the Order's accountants had. Anyway, playing Scrabble with Kenobi I was today. Had a labotomy first I should have so that fair it would be. "Spelled k-a-t, 'cat' is not, Kenobi." "Are you sure?" "Yes, Kenobi, sure I am." "But it sounds like 'kat'." "Spelled with a 'c' it is." "Oh! Good! I have a 'c'!" "No, Kenobi, spelled 'kac' it is not either." "This game is hard! How d'ya come up with big words like that?" he said. Pointing at the last word I laid down, he was. " 'Surf' you mean?" "Yeah, you gotta dictionary for a brain or somethin'?" "Kenobi, I really think more reading you should do." "I read!" "Talking about the back of your Cap'n Typho cereal box, I am not. Talking about actual books I am." "I got lots of books." "Count, coloring books do not. Books with words that you actually read, I am talking about." "I just got done readin' a book with actual words this mornin'!" "Really? Good for you! Called what it was?" "What?" "Called what it was? The title what was?" "Um...Wonder Wookiee, Issue 45." "A comic book, known I should have. Actually read the words did you, or just look at the pictures did you?" "Uh, well, I uh," "Mm hmm, just what I thought. Kenobi, turned into mashed potatoes your brain has." "Mmmm... mashed potatoes." "Focus, Kenobi. Besides, talking about the good creamy mashed potatoes I am not. Talking about the gritty, tasteless, instant kind I am. Want your brain to be gritty instant mashed potatoes do you?" "No?" To think about this for a few seconds before answering he had to. Still, sure he was not. "Of course you do not, Kenobi. That's why assigning you to read this book I am." A book I handed him. "You're givin' me home work? I'm a grown man! I don't have to do it if I don't want to!" "Of course, right you are, Kenobi. Your choice it is." "Good." "Your choice it is. Read this book you can, or get sprayed more with the pressure washer you can." "But, do you know how many times I've tried to get through that book? It's so long! And all the big words! It's impossible!" "Faith in you I have, Kenobi. Get through this you can. Besides, know what happens to Curious George how can you if get to the end you do not?" Due next week, his book report is. Looking forward to that, I am not. Really time for me to retire it is.