The Dark Side These Things Are

Very pervasive, the Dark Side is. Which explains why so popular reality TV is. Anyway, for your benefit, compiled a list of five things that are the Dark Side I have. Avoid them you must. The Dark Side These Things Are: Eating With Your Mouth Open. Listen, Kenobi, fall for the "Like seafood do you?" question anymore I will not! Disgusting that is. Eat it you should. Wear it you should not. Have to look at it, I should not. Anything That Says "Starring Mary Kate and Ashley Olson". Turn to pudding your brain will after one of their movies you watch. Also, always together in the same movie or television show they have to be. This is because so little they weigh that both of them to equal one whole person it takes. Besides, if seen one of their movies you have, seen them all you have. The exact same plot they have, just a different city they take place in. Take my word for it, you can. Seen all of their movies, I have... uh, for research! Yes, it that is. For research on the Dark Side, it was. Judge me not! Country Line Dancing. Yes, a fan of country music I am. But tell you let me that no good reason for so many rhythm-deprived rednecks to dance at one time, there can be. Come from that, no good can. Besides, unless branding cattle or breaking in a horse you are, wear a cowboy hat you should not! Fooling no one into believing a cowboy you are. Also, say your name or be bigger than your head, your belt buckle should not. My feelings on the matter those are. Printing Out Your Emails. Nothing like printing out your emails says, "Know how to use a computer I do not." You see, when to you emails come, in a handy place they can be seen - on your computer! Died a senseless death, many noble trees have because willing to learn your computer you were not. Talking On Your Cell Phone In the Bathroom. Want to speak to you while taking a dump you are, I do not! A solitary activity that is... except for some people in nursing homes, but the point that is not. More than willing to wait I am.