Monday, July 18, 2005

Bad Redneck Influence

A scare I had today. Word I received that being held by one of the Hutts, Kenobi was. Quickly to Tatooine I rushed. Ready to throw down and mount a major rescue I was.

Into Jabba the Hutt's lair I barged, with lightsaber drawn. Droids left and right I destroyed. Easily past the idiots who work for him I got.

"Alright, Jabba, futile resistance is! My Jedi hand over, or prepare for a major butt-whooping, you should!"

"Here no Jedi is," in Huttese, Jabba said, "Looking for Obi-Wan Kenobi you are? Hanging out he is with my loser redneck brother, Bubba the Hutt:"














Tell the difference between the Hutts I cannot. Like giant boogers with faces on them they all look.

Anyway, over to Mos Eisley Estates Trailer Park I rushed, to make sure that alright Kenobi was. Just hanging out they were, watching fishing shows while pork rinds they were eating and cheap beer they were drinking.

Bubba the Hutt said, "Hey little feller, come on in here and sit down. We were just about to turn on a monster truck show. Getcha a beer. You want some of this here chewin' tobacco?" Then, in a paper cup he spit.

"Kenobi, coming with me you are, right now!" I said.

I hope that too late I was not. Need this kind of influence Kenobi does not.

Comments on "Bad Redneck Influence"

 

Blogger Jar Jar Binks said ... (5:46 AM) : 

*sighs mournfully*
Issen too late. Obi hassen been converted fully, long long ago.

 

Anonymous bellringr said ... (7:47 AM) : 

Hey, that looks like the guy who lived in the house next to me when I was growing up! If he was a Hutt, that would explain a few things.....

 

Anonymous Wedge Antillies said ... (9:27 AM) : 

Kenobi was probably running away from your dietary restrictions. If he can't get pork rinds at the Temple, then he will find comfort and food with other friends.

First the toilet bowl, now the Cheetos, Obi-Wan needs to feel the love, Master.

 

Anonymous Anonymous said ... (9:43 AM) : 

(This is the Jedi Princess) Poor Obi-Wan! He's turned to the Redneck Side of the Force

 

Blogger JawaJuice said ... (10:44 AM) : 

Now THAT'S the reason I got off that rock in the first place!
You forgot about the cage wrestling and the Friday night speeder hood surfing.
eeeeesh...

 

Blogger jedisiri said ... (10:48 AM) : 

oh let him have some fun,he is a lonely man.

 

Blogger Draco-7 said ... (11:19 AM) : 

Nooo! Not another redneck jedi!

 

Blogger ninjanun said ... (12:11 PM) : 

Can you really say Bubba the Hutt even has a neck with a straight face? Much less a red one!

 

Blogger Jean-Luc Picard said ... (2:57 PM) : 

I have a daily 'You Might Be A Redneck' calendar.

 

Blogger Jon the Intergalactic Gladiator said ... (4:31 PM) : 

Is his main muscle Bubba Fett?

 

Blogger umchaos said ... (7:01 PM) : 

Master Yoda,
This has by-far been the funniest post in awhile. I was not aware that Hutts could be rednecks, or that Jabby had a brother!

hehehe... 'bubba the hutt'... HA!

 

Blogger Leia said ... (7:35 PM) : 

The first thing I thought of when reading your post was "Hubba The Butt." lol

Hanging out with respectable Hutts might even be a positive influence on Obi-Wan.

 

Blogger Barriss Offee said ... (8:41 PM) : 

Does this mean that Obi-Wan uses the Force to get himself beer?

 

Blogger Jenn said ... (6:00 PM) : 

Jethro the Redneck Jedi is alive and well and living in my basement, well, if I had a basement, that is where I'd put him. As it is, he sleeps in the bed with me, as he's my husband, the undisputed Star Wars freak of the free world. Get em Master Yoda.

 

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